home penissizedebate.com home page


The Site's Main Purpose
who it is intended for

This site's main content is a 56 page document called "The End of the Penis Size Debate". I wrote it as a kind of self-help tool for men who are troubled by penis size worries and who cannot let go of it. If you are just a regular guy, you might wonder if there are really men out there who worry that much about penis size. You better believe there are, and they go through some serious emotional suffering. If you are a woman reading this, then I'm sure you know very well what I'm talking about, since you probably already know some guy just like that.

A lot of visitors of the site mistakenly believe that it is aimed at all men. Not true, the site is only aimed at men who are already severely troubled by penis size worries before they come to the site. It doesn't matter whether these men are in fact small, average or above average.

To me it's a fact of life that the average woman deep down instinctively prefers a larger than average penis. On the other hand, I also know that the average woman doesn't let penis size be a significant issue in her everyday life, neither in her relationships with men. I know that even if the average woman might at times wish that her guy was just a little bigger, she will never let it interfere with her feelings or love for that person. Compared to us men, women are quite complex beings. They just think and feel on a very different level than most men.

However, I sincerely believe that men who are distraught by penis size anxiety, cannot be helped by trying to explain them how complicated or relative the whole issue is. The emotional pain they suffer comes from being thrown back and forth between doubts of "yes, size matters" versus "no it doesn't". Deep inside they already feel that size matters, but they have a hard time accepting it. Each time they are about to accept it and get over it, someone comes along saying no size doesn't matter. It is only when they fully accept that size matters to women, that they can find peace within themselves. Until that happens, there is no use in telling them that for most women penis size is in fact only of rather small importance in the whole "man-package", so to speak. That's how much this pre-occupation with size screws-up their head.

I also believe that the only way to achieve this is by brute force approach, sort of a penis-size-instruction boot camp, where the going gets tough before it gets better. I don't want to leave room for that subconscious doubt-causing little troublemaker in their head to regain overhand. Doubt is what kills such men. To be doubtful in life is good, but not when you're troubled by it to the point of becoming dysfunctional. That's why I slam them with generalized and simplified (and exaggerated) statements about what women want and feel sexually and vaginally. And I make sure to rub it in over and over. Yes there is a tone of humiliation and insult, and it's hard on them. At first, it creates upset and disbelief, then a feeling of frustration, weakness and inferiority. Afterwards they enter a stage where they become angry towards the creator of the site (me... gulp), even outraged. That's actually when things start to get better. Anger is a positive emotion, if it's not directed towards oneself, because it gives a person power, energy. Eventually this anger calms down and is followed by understanding and acceptance, not just acceptance of women's size preference but more importantly self-acceptance. The goal is to let them tear down the doubts, clean up the mess inside their head and start with a fresh plate. Once they are at this point, they are ready to drop the whole penis size issue and find their true worth as a man. Imagine the extra relief then, when, after having accepted that yes women prefer larger than average, they also learn that there are a whole lot of other things about men that matter to women, more than penis size. (Sure, I expect that some of these men will not come to accept what I lay out for them and won't get over their anger towards me. That is just fine. Better for them to hate someone else than to be depressed and full of self-hate.)

Such was my intention when I created the site a few years ago. At the start-up, I created a section where readers could post their comments (find it here). Although I also received plenty of positive comments at first, the amount of angry, even desolate responses was slowly getting to me. Was I making these men's lives better... or just worse? I considered closing the site numerous times. Then on March 21 2003, I received a comment that touched me deeply. It was titled "thank you" and came from an 18-year old guy who had been bothered by penis size since the year before. He stated how upset he was the first time he came to the site, but eventually understood things for what they were, and how, thanks to my site, he was able to put the whole penis-size issue behind him. Being very intrigued by the letter, I decided to find out if he had written other comments and how long he had been visiting the site already. Although it is a lot of work, this can be done (surfing the internet always leaves the computer's IP number and browser type in the logs together with the date and time). So I found out how he had visited my site for the first time about seven weeks earlier and that he was the author of five other comments (posted under different nicknames). In one of the comments, he even sarcastically pretends to be a woman who only accepts well-hung black men (it's so funny it still makes me laugh when I read it now.) Anyway, I will let you read them in the order they were posted, together with the numbers under which they appear in the comment pages. They show clearly how this young man goes through the various stages I just mentioned before.

Comment #99:

January 29, 2003
sorry but this site is bullshit 90% of men are between 5-7 inches, stop treating big penises like god, there is nothing a man can do about his penis size this site offends billions of men in the world who are average,by saying unless your huge your not a man are less of a man which is bullshit.

The following comment was never posted because I felt (correctly) that it came from a man pretending to be a woman. At the time I didn't think that as such it belonged on the site. Now I know that sometimes such comments are just part of the person's healing process.

January 29, 2003
Hi I am a 23, female and had my share of cocks i can say with all honesty this site is dead on. I agree with debra too, white mens penises are way too small only massive 12' black cocks satisfy me. sorry guys but if you are under 9' you might as well give up on pleasing a real woman. Thats why i only date black men, trust me girls the myth is beyond true most black men are hung like a horse and know how to satisfy a woman, most white men are absurdly small like 6' and 7'inches and are bad in bed. trust me black is back, and to all of the small men in the world under 8'just give up your never give a woman the penetration she deserves and desires.

Comment #165:

February 26, 2003
fuck this shit:
this promotes exactly what america wants us to do be insercure and feel like shit about our bodies, so they could get us to buy more of thier products

Comment #177:

March 3, 2003

Comment #205:

March 18, 2003
In the last two pages you gave advice for well hung men and small hung men how about guys that are average?? are you implying unless your well endowned like 5% of the population that you are small. That is insane to say unless your well endowned your small, also i dont know where you get your facts but every penis study ever done has shown only like 10% to 15% of men having 7 inch dicks (or more) here you claim 30%?????????? please show me the evidence on that. in the end i guess this stupid site is right i mean it makes sense women do prefer bigger penises, but what should us guys under 8" do? we represent 95% of the population. me being 18 i already given up on women realizing that a women can never love are want a man with a small or average penis and that i could never truly satisfy her. girls my age say they all want large and big penises and they dont want men under 8". i might as well just end it now or turn gay, knowing a women can never fully love or lust for a man with a average or small dick size.

Comment #215:

March 21, 2003
thank you:
Even know i should be mad and disagreeing cause i am average ( 6.6 in length and 5.4 around fully hard)i agree with almost every thing you say. You are right think about it if all other things being equal would a women not prefer a larger penis? of course she would!!!!!, but as others have stated things are never equal. I think a good analogy would be like saying all other things being a equal would a man not want to have a sex with a more physically attractive partner? of course. I think its just the way it is, but i am sure many women and men are satified with thier average parteners penis size and attractiveness but of course we would prefer to have a more well endowed or more beautiful partner. When i first read this site i was very upset and felt inferior that i could never please a women. Now i understand even though women truely deep down inside they desire a few more inches in length and more girth i realize i can still have very satisfying sex and that a women can have at great pleasure with my size. Even though i can never give as much pleasure and satifaction as a man say 9 by 7, i can still have good sexual relations with a women. I think even though i am not what they truely desire they can still love and cherish sex with me and accept my size. Many men are in a state of denial thinking that average is fine and women are truely satisfied by a average dick size (like mine)they got to learn to accept the truth. Accepting the truth that women really want you to pack a little more is a much greater way of living , average and small guys (like me) try to make themselves feel better by thinking that size doesnt matter.. blah blah blah. The only thing i disagree with you on is the racial differences in dick size i do think blacks are bigger and asians are smaller and whites are in between BUT on only buy like a half of a inch. Many studies confirm this, also like chris pointed out thier are other reasons for fear of the blacks mans penis size(slavery myths) but - i think and known this is just another stupid exgraggrated myth with a grain of truth. Well in the end at least in my life penis size (now) is of little importance now, i think many girls can be very happy with my size even though they desire more. I also want to say a big thank you to the author who wrote this i am young (18) and penis size always affected me greatly ever since last year. I also heard many times size doesnt matter and size does i wanted the truth and your 100% right knowing the truth about penis size is much better than thinking it dont matter. Thank you and goodbye if not for this site i would be worrying about penis size for years to come like crazy, but now i know for a fact yes its all true women instinctively prefer bigger than average penises!! and you know what i am perfectly alright with it.

It is touching, to me at least, how in the end he experiences a permanent release of his emotional torture. This eighteen-year old guy expresses more open-mindedness than a lot of the older men who have posted messages on the site. He also made me understand that from the total amount of hate mail I receive, a substantial part probably comes from men who are just going through a similar process. Just the same, a large part of the comments from so-called women who "only accept humongous black penises" are probably from such men as well. Browse through the comments and you'll see what I mean.

Like probably most of you, I do believe that the ultimate goal in everyone's life is happiness. I think that the reading of the site by those men who it is intended for, will let them find greater happiness afterwards (in the long run that is, ranging from days to weeks, depending on how much they are struggling with the issue).  Please remember, if you are not seriously bothered by thoughts of penis size inadequacy, then this site is not for you. If you still decide to read it, I ask you to always keep in mind what I explained on this page.



Defeating Fear of Rejection

My Favorite Adult Sex Sites

Penis Enlargement Opinion

Links  -  Table of Contents  -  Your Comments  -  Terms and Conditions

Copyright 2004  PenisSizeDebate.com